Skit: "Generation Debt"

Written for and premiered on the 65Fen Music Series with Jamie Jordan 6/22/15

M: So… You don’t think I could get more than $500 for this room full of furniture and the upright piano…?

J: mhmm


1x (tune) [i] vowel


M: I was reading a kidney goes for $250,000.

J: WHO’S SELLING A KIDNEY?!

M: Well, … me! 

J: ...

M: mhmm


3x (tune) whistle


J: But you’d have to pay somebody… to remove that… illegally, right?

M: Right. The surgeon, and then the organ broker who’d take a cut…

J: mhmm (looks)


3x (tune) hums


M: Well, if I get a lung removed during the same surgery… Hey… those go for like $400,000…

J: Wait. ...Lung. But you’re a singer…

M: mhmmm

J: hmmm?

M: Yeah, yeah. I’ve thought it through. So I won’t get to sing Brunhilde roles… I’m OK with that. 

J: So you’re going to compromise your career? 

M: (responds with a look)

J: Next thing you’re going to tell me is that you’ll get an eye removed, wear an eye patch and just do studio work?

M: Oh, naw. Eyes don’t go for that much money.

J: WHAT. You thought about that too?

M: Mhmmm


4x (tune) overtones


J: WHY ALL THIS ANYWAY?

M: Well, I didn’t want to default on my student loans…

J: UHHHHH

M: Ehhhh

J: Ummmm


2x (tune) hums


M: But you think I could sell this furniture for $500 though?

J: mhmmm

M: mhmmmm…

J: (looks)

M: I found out I could sell my hair for $650…

J: Well, at least that grows back…

M: Yeah…

J: mhmm

M: mhmmm.

J: (shakes head 10 secs)

M: (nods 10 secs)

J+M look at each other then at audience