M: So… You don’t think I could get more than $500 for this room full of furniture and the upright piano…?
1x (tune) [i] vowel
M: I was reading a kidney goes for $250,000.
J: WHO’S SELLING A KIDNEY?!
M: Well, … me!
3x (tune) whistle
J: But you’d have to pay somebody… to remove that… illegally, right?
M: Right. The surgeon, and then the organ broker who’d take a cut…
J: mhmm (looks)
3x (tune) hums
M: Well, if I get a lung removed during the same surgery… Hey… those go for like $400,000…
J: Wait. ...Lung. But you’re a singer…
M: Yeah, yeah. I’ve thought it through. So I won’t get to sing Brunhilde roles… I’m OK with that.
J: So you’re going to compromise your career?
M: (responds with a look)
J: Next thing you’re going to tell me is that you’ll get an eye removed, wear an eye patch and just do studio work?
M: Oh, naw. Eyes don’t go for that much money.
J: WHAT. You thought about that too?
4x (tune) overtones
J: WHY ALL THIS ANYWAY?
M: Well, I didn’t want to default on my student loans…
2x (tune) hums
M: But you think I could sell this furniture for $500 though?
M: I found out I could sell my hair for $650…
J: Well, at least that grows back…
J: (shakes head 10 secs)
M: (nods 10 secs)
J+M look at each other then at audience